Friday, September 9, 2011


So it has been a year since I came back from the States, have been jumping around figuring out what I wanted to do. I must say, time flies so fast, the journey has been rewarding despite the fact I'm still jobless and studyless at the moment ;)

Yes, I've resign my post as an RA and decided to not pursue my PhD at UM, I'm half disappointed and half 'wowed' by myself. Disappointed that I had to leave my research halfway but wowed that I was brave enough to make that decision. Why you may asked,I'm not sure either, I dont know why I dont want to pursue my PhD now despite being all excited at the beginning. Maybe because suddenly I realize that..I'm not ready or I don't like the idea I'm continuing locally or I cant grasp the significance of my research or I'm not comfortable with the system in the lab or with the people I'm working with or I'm too paranoid with nematode but definitely not because of sakit seketika tu. I've lost my motivation for some reasons, but not at all I feel incapable of doing it, I just dont want it at the moment. I'm glad I tried to do it though, now I know when, what, how, where,why I want to do my PhD, IF I ever decide to do it again.

An important lesson I've learned from this pass whole year is that SOMETIMES changing your attitude is not really the solution, because at times, it is not your attitude, is it really something else...

Today we come across an individual who behaves like an automaton, who does not know or understand himself, and the only person he knows is the person that he is suppose to be, whose meaningless chatter has replaced communicative speech , whose synthetic smile has replaced genuine laughter, and whose sense of dull despair has taken place of genuine pain. Two statements may be said concerning this individual. One is that he suffers from defect of spontaneity  and individuality, which may seem to be incurable. At the same time, it may be said of him he does not differ essentially from the millions of the rest of us who walk upon this earth. 
Erich Fromm

And another valuable lesson learn is: you may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try. TRUE! But if you want to start a career a.s.a.p, you dont have all the time in the worldlah to try everything, choose wisely of chances that are worth trying.

And, prayers..well everyone already know this..they do wonders! :)

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

2 weeks of doing nothing :)

I think I have a problem, I'm okay with being thirsty. Weird.
Malas gler nak update blog. Normal.

Life is full of surprises. 

Anyways, semalam pergi wat medical check-up di Klinik Kesihatan Putrajaya Persint 9, received great services from every single staff. Tak faham where all the complains are coming from, and the waiting time is not that long pun, maybe because I'm only doing a medical check-up and not actually seeing a MO or a doctor, but will need to next Tuesday with yesterday test results. We'll see how next week goes.

Procedure Room 21 was in the same area as Klinik Kesihatan Ibu dan Anak (I believe that area is called that, hehe), I think it's so cute that the fathers were accompanying the mothers for their baby/child check-up. I saw a father in an army formal uniform widely smiling as his small baby boy came out form the injection room with the mother, crying softly. He took the baby from the mother, kissed him and said 'Hero anak ayah ni, tak nangis kena inject kan..' and put him snugly in his  stroller. Comel sangat the scene maybe because the father was in uniform ;) and there were so many other cute fathers, some were readings to their babies, some were looking over their small child playing some games on ipad, some were carrying their babies while their child happily playing around with their chain matrix cards. It's great when we can opt  to not make our work our priority at some time during working hours, because from 8-5 you're not only an employee, you're still a son, a daughter, a father, a mother, a sister, a brother with responsibilities.

Were you ever sick at school and your mother cannot come to your aid because of work..? Sedihkan. And I'm sure the mother is ever more heart broken. But what to do, nowadays, the believe is production is more important than family.
If you were a true leader, you would sacrifice yourself for the better of your people, no? Not like sacrifice your life but rather your need to be in power.

Kesian Melayu, menang sorak kampung tergadai.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Salam Hari Raya Aidilfitri

Selamt Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir Batin :)

Perbezaan paling ketara tahun ni: Wan tak wat lemang untuk hari raya sebab Wan sihat tapi Wan dah kurang bertenaga skit. And tahun ni rindu sangat dekat Atok and Tok Ayah. And tahun ni bagi duit raya tapi packet duit raya masih ade lagi beberapa puluh, maka jemputlah datang rumah beraya bg yang mengenali :)